NEWS

Published on March 31st, 2020 | by sligoadmin

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Keep Them Up in the Lockdown

In these straitened times women are being asked to “lift and separate” for the good of the planet.

Women

Since the lockdown came into force many  women have ditched their bras. They are enjoying new found freedom in letting the puppies out. “It’s liberating,” said Samantha who works for SSN but in the current crisis is dialing in and “working” from home. “It’s been great and I’m loving it”. 

Worldwide

However there have been numerous reports from various sources that remain difficult to verify and therefore must be true – going bra-less may have long term consequences. Experts worldwide agree. Here’s the science.

Back

Unsupported tities could damage the Cooper ligaments which help to keep them perky. If a bra isn’t used for support a woman could end up damaging her back. It can lead to bad posture and gravity will take it’s toll.

Advice

Men are rightly worried and have been calling helplines in their droves. The general advice is to encourage the women in their lives to don a bra to keep the side up. A lot of men have also asked about this Cooper bloke. Many concerned men are perking up and taking notice of the aforementioned advice.

So here at SligoSligoNews we are encouraging everyone with a decent pair to continue bra use for their health, for the  general good and – will someone please think of the children?

Samantha (office) has a great pointy pair and all the lads in the office would be disappointed if she lost those assets. Someone did ask if “fat John” should follow the advice? But that’s obviously a no.

 

 


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