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Published on March 16th, 2018 | by sligoadmin

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Sligo Lad Spray Paints Cock Green

‘He claims it’s in honour of our patron saint,’ girlfriend Shirley ‘Nutter’ McNulty (42) declared. ‘And I’m not his girlfriend any more, make sure you make that crystal clear,’ she said.

Cock

Jonnie ‘Chickenshit’ O’Reilly (18) is said to be obsessed with two things in life – our national holy day and his cock. Shirley confirmed, ‘he saw the reports on the news where famous cultural landmarks around the world were being painted green to celebrate St. Patrick’s day. He thinks his cock is on a parallel with these landmarks.’

Story

Former girlfriend and mother of four Shirley confided that she believed the story was fabricated. ‘I know for a fact,’ she said ‘the head of that cock was already a bit green before he ever went at it with a spray can. I saw it with my very own eyes.’

Chickenshit

It’s believed that angry animal rights activists are said to be scouring the country trying to locate Chickenshit. However Shirley urged caution and issued a stark warning to those activists and members of the public – ‘Don’t approach him. He’s a psycho. I once caught him trying to strangle that cock with his bare hands. When he saw me I could tell he was about to explode.’

 


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