NEWS

Published on December 16th, 2019 | by sligoadmin

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Washing Is Out

The men of Sligo have been rejoicing as news filters through that it’s ok not to wash this Christmas.

Wash

Every Christmas the debate rages whether you should wash or not. This year is no different and the latest report from top boffins states that you categorically should not wash.

Vox

SligoSligoNews took to the streets for a vox-pop find out what the ordinary person (mostly women) around town thinks of the announcement. It seems to have  caused a bit of a stir around Sligo. 

 

Foreskin

“He’s a dirty bastard at the best of times,” said Sheila, “it’s a constant battle to get him to soap up and clean his scrotum. And he never does under his foreskin”.

We met Tara  outside Tesco – “I’m worried that if the men of Sligo believe they don’t have to wash then the kids will copy them and do the same ”.

“It’s a f*&king disgrace,” said a worried Amy in the car park outside Penneys, “he tried not washing about two years ago and it got so bad people stopped calling to the house. The smell of shite was overpowering”.

We met Mary and John shopping in Dunnes – “It’s marvellous isn’t it and we’ll save a bit of money on water we don’t have to heat,” posed John. “Get lost you filthy f&^K,” said Mary, “When they say you shouldn’t wash, it’s the turkey they mean before you cook it”.


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